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 December 07, 2004

Help! They Didn't Write Back (boo hoo)


Ever been stood up for a date? Yeah me too - join the club. Online, it can be just as bad if someone doesn't answer your emails, or stops writing to you after a couple of emails back and forth. What's a gal (or dude) to do? "Get over it!", says the tough me. Ok, that's fine, I can deal with it... but what can I do to stop it from happening again?


Help! The @$&% Didn't Write Back - What's UIp with That!?

I've had all kinds of responses from guys I've emailed, from "great wanna get together?" to "thank no thanks" and even the frequent "no answer". Here's a few ideas that may help you deal with life in cyberspace when someone doesn't reply to your carefully-written email:.

Check their Ideal Match: If he's looking for a 5'10" local blonde blue eyed Norse goddess who's into skiing and aerobics, and you're a 5'2" brunette who likes shopping - ah can you see why you didn't get an email back? Be sure to Premium Dating's Virtual Matchmaker feature to ensure good two-way matches.

Write More Specific Emails and Ask Questions: Don't write a boring email like "hey i liked your profile, email me sometime" ...Write a good email, like "Hi Steve, nice bio - so, you're into reading? - that's cool, I like books too" ..And take it from there .. write interesting, specific emails to people.. keep it brief, just a sentence or two at first, to see if the interest is mutual.

Have Your Photo Re-Taken: You might want to try getting another photo taken - this time, get a professional photo. They look much better, than the casual one of you hanging around your apartment that your friend or ex took. "

Write Lots of People: IStudies have shown that even on online dating sites with active members, usually people will respond to less than 1 in 12 emails that they receive! So, you may need to write quite a few. Look at it as a tradeoff, at least you can contact people from home in front of a computer now, instead of going to nightclubs and supermarkets :) But, it will take some work and patience. That's ok, finding the right person is worth it! Just remember to write a lot of brief, specific emails to people you're interested in.

Was it Something You Said? Ask a friend or family member to take a look at one of the emails you may want to send, and get their ideas. Maybe you're sounding too impersonal, or maybe too desperate, or maybe too bland. Whatever, get someone to help you for your first few emails, and see what happens! Don't be discouraged if at first you don't succeed, finding people, most of whom are already busy, is challenging. Remember that your photo is likely to be the most important thing they pay attention to, not the words in your first email. So, have a great-looking recent professional photo online to get best responses. Hang in there, eventually you can find the right person for friendship and romance!



Brenda Kalinowski, Datelife.com

Posted by LC at December 7, 2004 04:12 PM


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