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December 30, 2004
Reading Between the Lines
Reading through the personal ads can be a skill, an art in its own.
You may find that skimming through the personal ads has become your latest habit, searching for the person that meets your profile needs and desires but without success. Have you been looking for love but in the wrong profiles, or are you searching for more that is not written in the lines of a personal ad? If you read more into a personal ad than what is actually written in the profile and in the pages of the personal classifieds, you may find yourself conversing or dating a person that does not have the same personal dating ideas as you or the same objective in a relationship which puts you back at the beginning of the process again.
You already know that the listings in the personal section are from people just like you, people who want to meet someone special to fit into their life so starting with the personal ads is a great way to meet someone. However, maybe you are reading the profile of someone wanting to find just a friend, or maybe the profiles you are reading is someone that is also hinting towards a search for love in a relationship. You need to be a distinctive reader.
The odds are in your favor when searching the personal ads for in finding a companion or lover. You already know that if the profiles you are reading are not seeking some type of friendship or relationship, they would not have created a profile for others to review. However, the steps in deciding who you will make contact with can be one of the most difficult in your search.
Your journey reading the personal classified section will require the need to look within yourself discovering what you type of relationship you are truly in search of. Are you searching for a friend, for a lover, or are you searching for a true lifetime commitment? Whatever category you place yourself in, choose the replies and profiles that meet your standards in your search for a relationship helping you narrow your search, which will make the personals much easier to sort through. If you would sit in front of your computer and continue reading all of the personal ads presented, you may find yourself overwhelmed with information and choices to be made. Narrowing your criteria and the idea of what type of relationship you are searching for creates the best results.
If you are searching for a friend or companion only through the personal ads, start with profiles that state this specifically in their profile, which you will find many. In discussing profiles of those who are not looking for a serious relationship, you may find the following phrases used: "want to have a good time", "not looking for a relationship" and "not willing to give my heart away", "just want to spend some time with you" or "seeking another with a great listening ear". There are various words used expressing friendship, companionship and those just looking to date. Use these expressions and words to help you sort through the personal ads narrowing your decision among the many people listed.
Profiles of people searching for friendship use words that stick out like: "looking for fun", "friendship", "no commitments", "companion wanted", "only looking for a good time", "need help in building my confidence", "I want to roller blade in the park all day", finding words that express fun and friendship stating no commitments or relationship will help you sort through the profiles you are reading.
Are you in search of that someone special to be more than just friends are? Learn to read more into the written words. Find descriptions such as "looking for love", "searching for that someone special", "more than friends", "quiet and cozy", "easy going and lovable", "special times", "treasured moments", and words similar to "lovable".
So what about your profile, read over the words again. Does the profile really express your thoughts about a relationship, what type of relationship you are seeking and whom you are expecting to meet using the personal classifieds? Deciding what type of person you are searching for, what qualities you desire, and how far you want the relationship to mature are steps in realizing you are taking the right direction for meeting that someone special through the classifieds. Clarify your words, express your real thoughts and ideas about who you are seeking clearly which will aid those that are reading your profile connect easily with you.
Matching your personality and the relationship you are seeking with the personal profile or description of another person that is seeking similar relationships can be tough but using your feelings of what you want from a relationship as a basis when reading and sorting through the personals is a great beginning.
by Cheryl Lewis
Posted by LC at December 30, 2004 05:39 PM
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