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February 12, 2005
The Differences That Make A Difference
There is a guy out there that attracts w0men so easily you'd think it was magic. Whenever he goes out...
at the grocery store, at work, or at the bar... women turn around to look at him, they go out of their way to be around him hoping that he will talk to them. The guy has absolutely no problem getting dates any time he wishes. With the ladies, he has it made.
The funny thing is that he's a lot like you. He has similar looks, he's about the same height, drives a similar car, and makes the same amount of money.
So what's so different about this guy? Why do all the women want to be with him?
There are 5 differences between this guy and the guy's that wish they could be like this guy. Surprisingly, it's the little things that make the big difference. Little things that are completely within your control.
DIFFERENCE # 1:
When he walks in people notice
This man walks into a room with confidence that you can sense. A type of confidence that can't be faked. His head is held high, his gaze is calm and unapologetic. He doesn't glance around like a nervous freshman at homecoming to see if anyone is looking at him. Rather, he expects people to be looking at him and he is comfortable with this.
His grooming is impeccable and his clothes are neat and fashionable, not gaudy or outdated. He takes pride in his appearance (however humble or average it may be) and it shows. His walk is deliberate and even-paced - never rushed or nervous.
If you didn't know any better, from your first impression anyway, you would think that this guy has everything. But, he doesn't. He's just like you.
He knows that you don't have to have a perfect life to be perfectly confident.
DIFFERENCE # 2:
He talks and people listen
When he says something it's not to get attention. He's not worried about being the life of the crowd or talking just to hear his voice. Because of this, when he says something people look at him and listen since they know that there will be more than just nonsense coming out of his mouth.
He never talks trash. He knows that this makes him look petty, untrustworthy, and insecure.
He acts natural. He doesn't try to be something he's not. He has "that something," that charisma, that personal magnetism that comes with being genuine and congruent. People are drawn to this quality and admire it.
He knows that people can sense when people are being fake, trying too hard, or trying to give a false impression so he avoids these things at all costs. Though it sounds cheesy, sometimes he consciously, deliberately centers himself to be sure that he's "being real" and not trying to impress others.
DIFFERENCE # 3:
He's a doer, not a thinker
At the bar there is a beautiful woman and, of course, there is a group of guys in the corner who want her number. They appear to be working up the courage to start a conversation with her. It's difficult though because she is with a friend who won't leave her alone so that they can make their move. Meanwhile, This guy notices the woman and, in spite of the fact that she is with a friend and you would think she is way out of his league given his looks, he walks right up, introduces himself the same way he would to anyone, and begins asking the same normal questions you would ask anyone that you want to know better:
Where are you from?
What do you do?
What are you doing at a place like this?
Sure, it's not great conversation but this man knows that it's better to act than to wait for the perfect moment and the perfect thing to say. When most men approach her and try to talk this woman isn't receptive but this guy, because he is so obviously genuine, doesn't put of that needy and, paradoxically, condescending vibe that most other guys do. She likes that.
DIFFERENCE # 4:
He's easy to talk to
During the conversation he's calm, relaxed. If you didn't know any better, you would think he was talking to an old friend from way back.
He keeps the conversation light-hearted, friendly, and pleasant by smiling and maintaining eye contact. He's not cracking great jokes or sweeping her off her feet with Don Juanesque romantic banterings. He's more or less just genuinely interested in listening to her and she likes that.
But, perhaps the most important thing is that there is absolutely no hint that a "pick-up" is in progress. If you were observing from across the room you'd think he was only talking to her because he was killing time, you may even think that he was married by how relaxed and not needy he was.
You may even say to yourself "That guy has no game, he's doing it all wrong"
DIFFERENCE # 5:
He knows what to say
At the end of the night he knows what he wants. He wants to get to know that woman he was talking to better. Some guys would silently wish to themselves that they could see her again, curse themselves for not knowing how to ask, miss the opportunity, go home, and fall asleep wondering if they will ever run into that incredible girl again.
Not this guy, he understands that if he wants something then he needs to do everything in his power to get it.
These are the exact words he uses:
"I had a great time talking to you tonight. I'd like to see you again. Can I get your number?"
Lame? Canned? Predictable? Yes, definitely. But, oddly enough, it works. It worked this time, it worked in the past, and it will continue to work in the future.
This guy doesn't wonder how to ask, he doesn't try to come up with the perfect line to get her number. Asking IS simple and he doesn't make things so complicated that he misses opportunities.
That's it. Five differences. Too simple? Perhaps, but if it were this simple, wouldn't it be worth the effort to give it a shot and find out?
Your goal should be to become this man. It's very, very possible. After all, it's only 5 things.
From:www.datestacker.com
Posted by LC at February 12, 2005 09:05 AM
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